The Countdown Begins ...

39 Sleeps.

39 short sleeps until my toes touch American soil again. 

Am I excited?? 

Yes.

No.

Yes….

Lists are a wonderful thing.  I would not have gotten as much ready to go without multiple versions floating around on my table right now.

Clothing list.

Still-to-do list.

Holiday shopping list.

Food-for-the-tribe-while-I’m-gone List. 

Some disproportionate to the others by a long shot.

But those lists are starting to become a source of panic in themselves.

The closer I look, the more I feel the pressure of the next 38 days of activity and how I am going to a) fit it all in, and b) afford everything on them.

I am the epitome of ‘so much to do, so little time’.

I wish that I was one of those travelers that just rocked up to the gate, secure in the knowledge that the manicure is perfect, the right amount of shoes are packed and everything in the suitcase fits and looks fabulous.

But alas, I am not.  I know from many past experiences of flying out on an adventure, I will likely not sleep the night before.  I will likely have to cross ‘essential’ travel accessories off the list due to budget re-evaluation.  I will likely be still waxing areas of flesh in the middle of the night as it’s the only time I have and the worst possible time to be doing it.

I also ALWAYS have the sinking feeling of dread that something will transpire to cancel the trip all together at the eleventh hour… its happened before and I was distraught for weeks.

Nothing in my world is rock steady.  My life is always a moving walkway that doesn’t always travel in the direction I want it to.  As a single mum and the only breadwinner of the family, juggling two tacked together casual jobs, this is a mammoth effort to get this happening .

I am rostered on to work 6 days a week till the day I leave, but as has happened in the past, I could easily have work cancelled with little or no notice and find myself with no income for a fortnight (or longer) somewhere between now and departure day.

Multiple times.

That in a nutshell is why I have learned to walk with sea legs.  I don’t have a soft place to fall.  If I stumble on the work front between now and then, I will just have to keep staggering forward with a lighter wallet. 

So am I excited?

 Yep… some days I’m all but euphoric hardly able to believe that in a little over a month I will be off on another wonderful adventure. 

And No… some days the battle to stay on my feet make the whole thing seem like an unreachable dream.

So each item I cross off my list is such a monumental achievement it brings an inordinate amount of happy.

 And when I take my window seat on the flight I wanted, with the airline I wanted, to the holiday I wanted, I know that anything is possible if you set your mind to it and my excitement level will be off the chart. 

Only then though, will I believe its actually going to happen. 

Lisa  XOXO